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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28621014">The Bizarre Wizard</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tatsurou/pseuds/Tatsurou'>Tatsurou</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, ジョジョの奇妙な冒険 | JoJo no Kimyou na Bouken | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 10:13:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,598</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28621014</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tatsurou/pseuds/Tatsurou</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When the magics clashed on the night Harry's parents died for him, it awoke something that had been buried in his bloodline, something that would reshape him and the world around him as he lived.  And when a certain man who refused to stop moving until his debt was paid stumbled across him, Harry James Joseph Potter would find that life was more than a little Bizarre, but quite worth living.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Bizarre Wizard</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hagrid carefully sifted through the rubble that had once been the Potter residence.  He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named had found them somehow, and come for them himself.  Somehow, the clash of magics had obliterated the house, and the only good news was Dumbledore being able to confirm that the Dark Lord had indeed fallen as a result.  Now Hagrid was doing his best to ensure that the one survivor Dumbledore was able to confirm was retrieved safely.  The young - far too young - Harry Potter would be recovered and placed somewhere that Dumbledore would determine was safe for him to grow up in, and with luck this would be the worst thing that would happen to him in his life.</p>
<p>As Hagrid finally uncovered the squalling infant, he had a sudden premonition that it would be far from the worst thing to happen in his life...but at the same time, those other worse things to happen would be more concerned about the lad happening to them.</p>
<p>The curses and protections had awoken something in young Harry, and though he didn't fully understand it, Hagrid could <em>feel</em> it.  As the child wailed, the eyes were drawn to the lightning bolt shaped scar on his forehead...and the clearly shaped, brilliant purple, five-pointed star birthmark underneath it.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <em>Five years later...</em>
</p>
<p>A tall man strolled calmly through the village of Little Whinging.  He was rather handsome by certain standards, his features declaring him to be of German descent, although there was something overall stiff about his face and motions that caused many who saw him to give him a wide berth.  As he walked, his limbs moved stiffly, and every so often he heard his joints creak or squeak.  He made a mental note to see about that at the next opportunity.</p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Memo: joint servicing</p>
  <p>Reason: unacceptable noise levels</p>
  <p>Date/Time: ASAP</p>
</blockquote><p>With that done, he continued his walk.  He wasn't entirely certain why he was here, but something in the parts of himself that still responded to instinct and gut feeling had driven him this way, memories of events he'd long tried and failed to forget coming back more strongly than they should, and thoughts of an old debt plaguing his mind.  He never did fully repay that debt, even if one of his arms was partial payment.  He got the arm back, after all...</p>
<p>His head swiveled of its own accord, his blonde hair bouncing in its spiky flat-top, his eyes twisting as they zoomed in on what had drawn his attention.  A boy nearly five feet tall was hunched up on himself as though beaten despite being surrounded by children who barely cleared three feet.  Something about the physique was very familiar to the German man who watched, despite the smaller size...and when the boy looked up, he saw the mark.</p>
<p>This was confirmation.  Here was a child of the bloodline to whom the man owed such a debt.  Though he had received much restoration and improvements since that time, the heart that beat in his chest remained unchanged...metaphorically speaking.  He would repay the debt he owed to the bloodline.  Having locked onto the child, he waited until he moved to head home before following him into a cul-de-sac.  He watched the boy walk up to a house, almost having to duck to get through the doorframe...only for the people inside to immediately start haranguing him, only for him to hang his head despite plainly having done nothing wrong as far as the man could tell.  It was when the man reached for his belt, however, that the one watching decided this could not be allowed.</p>
<p>The door had closed by the time the German man had reached the house, but this did not deter him.  The wood of the door fell around him as he simply walked through it, not even his hairdo being mussed by the impact.  "Hold!" he declared dramatically, one arm extending in a rigid bar forward with his hand extended flat.  "That boy is of the blood of a dear friend of mine, to whom I owe a great debt!  Whilst I move, you shall not bring harm to him whilst he will not defend himself!"</p>
<p>The old, somewhat portly man who had pulled off his belt jumped back in surprise as the German burst through the door.  "What in blazes?" he demanded angrily.  "You freaks said you'd leave us alone if we watched him!"</p>
<p>"I know not to whom you refer, but regardless of its fall my loyalty is only to the Motherland and to the debt I owe!" the man declared dramatically as he stomped forward.  The older man swung the belt defensively, but it barely registered on impact.</p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Offensive strike detected.</p>
  <p>Weapon: leather belt</p>
  <p>Damage: Negligible surface abrasion</p>
  <p>Suggested Response: Ignore.</p>
</blockquote><p>"Who are you?" the boy asked in confusion.</p>
<p>The German man smiled broadly as he extended his arm again.  "I am Colonel Rudol von Stroheim!" he declared expansively, his voice briefly having a bit of static due to a minor error in his voice box.  "And you, young man, are of the line of my dear friend Joseph Joestar, to whom I still owe a great debt!  Though I know not where he or other members of his family line are, I can see by the birthmark upon your brow that you are of his line!  Though that is not where the mark normally appears, I can see in the way you move and carry yourself the resemblance that breeds true!  You are a Joestar through and through, and as I see that none of these people you live with are Joestars, I shall take it upon myself to ensure that you are properly cared for so that you grow healthy, happy, and strong as your ancestors would want!"</p>
<p>As the boy stared up at him in confusion but a slowly dawning hope, the older man backed away, his stance and voice showing a mix of anger and fear.  "If you want the brat, take him!  We never wanted his freakishness here in the first place!"</p>
<p>"Gladly will I take him!" Stroheim declared expansively before putting his arm around the boy, now noticing just how badly clad he was.  The shirt was much too small for him, leaving the entirety of his arms and much of his midriff bare, and the shorts barely fit below.  "Come, young man!  At the very least, with me you will be properly clothed!  What is your name?"</p>
<p>The boy swallowed nervously as he accepted the guidance.  "Harry James Joseph Potter," he offered, his voice low and oddly musical.</p>
<p>"Ah!  And so even parted, you are still a Jojo!" Stroheim declared happily as he started to lead the boy out of the house.</p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Alert: Unknown energy reaction detected.</p>
  <p>Analyzing...unable to analyze.</p>
  <p>Purpose...determined to be protective.</p>
  <p>Source...resonance reaction.</p>
  <p>Resonance...between blood of subject Harry James Joseph Potter and the woman and child in the kitchen.</p>
</blockquote><p>Stroheim's head spun around on his neck, causing the older man behind him to pale visibly.  "You there!" he demanded authoritatively.  "Harry is related by blood to your wife and son and not you, is that correct?"</p>
<p>"Y-yes," the man managed to get out, barely finding his voice.  "But you're taking him, so-"</p>
<p>Stroheim spun around.  "Apparently, there is some sort of protection on the lad, tied to his blood tie," he stated firmly.  "As I do not share blood with him, I cannot extend that protection.  As such, he will remain here."</p>
<p>The man started to swell up angrily.  "Now see here-"</p>
<p>Stroheim extended one arm, and it warped and unfolded, the skin pulling back to reveal the metal underneath as the latest in German Engineering revealed itself.  A single barrel extended with energy glowing within, a revolving chamber endlessly feeding it energy once it was ready to fire.  The Gatling buster cannon was the finest weapon German Engineering could offer for cyborg soldiers such as himself, and he had one in each arm.  "And I shall be remaining as well!" he declared firmly.  "After all, I have a debt to pay and a promise to keep!"</p>
<p>The man promptly fainted dead away.</p>
<p>Stroheim turned to Harry.  "Who is this wastrel?" he demanded coldly.</p>
<p>"That's my Uncle Vernon," Harry allowed apologetically.  "He and Aunt Petunia have been...taking care of me...alongside Cousin Dudley..."</p>
<p>"Well there is no reason to worry now, young JoJo!" Stroheim declared expansively.  "I am here for you now!  Now, where is your room?"</p>
<p>Harry pointed to a cupboard under the stairs.</p>
<p>Stroheim frowned.  The boy likely could barely fit in there, and if he got any bigger he wouldn't.</p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Scans of domicile complete</p>
  <p>Three bedrooms located on second floor.</p>
  <p>One master bedroom</p>
  <p>Two regular bedrooms</p>
  <p>One shows signs of being lived in</p>
  <p>One contains only objects</p>
</blockquote><p>"Well, there appears to be one room that is only storage!" Stroheim declared firmly.  "That shall be your room from now on."</p>
<p>"But that's Dudley's second bedroom..." Harry began awkwardly.</p>
<p>"Does he have a second body to require a second bed?" Stroheim demanded incredulously.</p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Scan complete.</p>
  <p>Subject 'Dudley' located.</p>
  <p>Vitals analyzed...</p>
</blockquote><p>As Harry rubbed the back of his head uncertainly, Rudol raised an eyebrow.  "Almost, apparently!" he concluded in surprise.  "But enough of that!  Come!  Your new life begins now, and it will get better from here or my name is not Rudol von Stroheim!"</p>
<p>Harry followed the man up the stairs, uncertain what had happened to his life now...but he wasn't going to complain.  It wouldn't be the gentlemanly thing to do, after all.</p>
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